Healing: Psalm 147:3

"He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds."
Psalm 147:3

 

Happy Saturday to all of my lovely readers!  Christmas is a mere four days away, and yet every time I make an excuse to go out in the bustle of busy last minute shoppers (like myself), I tend to find yet one more thing I need to buy for someone... or maybe myself.

The holidays are a difficult time for me (which you can read about more here) - with past relationships, having a broken household at age eighteen, and being consumed with a feeling of disappointment, grief, anxiousness, "what-ifs" and the like.  This is the time where I need to surround myself with loving family and friends - it's hard when the "strong" person needs comfort and support.  I cannot account for all of the times that my Savior has saved me from my grievances, and reminded me of His unfailing love.  Regardless of how many times I stumble and fall, He is always there with loving arms and always ready to listen, and to share His wisdom.  

"Satisfy us each morning with your unfailing love,
    so we may sing for joy to the end of our lives."
Psalm 90:14 

This year has been a very trying and challenging year - and sometimes I can see the underlying message that God wants me to embrace and learn from - whether it be patience, understanding, forgiveness, trust, purity, and all other admirable attributes that are pleasing to Him.  

Let me be patient, let me be kind,
make me unselfish, without being blind.
I may have faith to make mountains fall,
but if I lack love then I am nothing at all.
-Unknown 

Let me be one of many to say that living in this secular world is very difficult.  We are surrounded by greed, pride, sex, money, lust, entitlement, revenge, wrath, lies, and probably many more I can't think of off the top of my head.  As a Christian, I am no where near perfect, rather a work in progress, I find it equally (if not more) difficult to not stray away from the straight and narrow.  With so many temptations, so many ways to get what I want, it's so hard to keep my eyes set on God who sent His only son to die and pay for my sins.  

Allow me to explain...

After ending a seven year off-and-on fling, I decided that I wanted to take dating more seriously and more proactively.  My girl friends can attest that this year has definitely been the year of the boy cycle for me.  I have dated from the Napoleon's to the "I can wear my six inch heels and get away with it" types, to the "I can have a genuinely intelligent conversation with you" to the "Oh dear, this is going nowhere" types.  

Needless to say, I have accumulated some hysterical stories that put me in a good mood when I need a laugh.  Others have provided me with tears that gave me the strength to get back up again and rely on God instead of someone else.  Interestingly enough, you can even see a pattern in the pictures that I pin on Pinterest, depending upon what is going on in my life.   

Although it has been a bumpy ride, I am so thankful that I learned from each guy - whether it be to know what I do or do not want in a future husband, and even what I am looking for spiritual wise, physically, emotionally, and intellectually.  One steady fact remains - guys are just as, if not more, confusing than girls (and definitely more into playing games, if I might add). 

   

That will be me... soon.  Sooner than later.  When God says it's the right timing.  Anytime would be fabulous.  No, wait.  God's in control.  Yes, He is in control of my life, and He knows what is best for me.  Even when I disagree and fight like a neurotic toddler, He is the voice of reason.  Hallelujah. 

I don't know what 2014 will hold for me.  I don't know if it's going to be love, heartache, desire, deceit, assurance, patience, or simply trusting in God.  But one thing is for sure, no more "I wish."

"I will." 

I will trust in God's timing.  I will continue to eat healthy and not gain those thirty pounds back.  I will invest more into my friendships and relationships.  I will strive to be like Christ and honor Him in any way I can.  

I will.