Blessed

For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weakness, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities.  For when I am weak, then I am strong.  

--2nd Corinthians 12:10

I am fully willing to say I am a Target and LakeShore Learning junkie, and, not surprisingly, I am addicted to books.  Especially when those books are clearanced to under $3. I actually had twice as many books in my cart (aka buggy for you cool people who call them that), but my one of my best friends kept me grounded.  Lord knows if I didn't have her as my designated "mom", I would have bought the entire store.  Thank you, Half Price Books for turning me into a little kid again. 

As promised, I finally took pictures of my new office today.  Ignore the mess and the un-hung cork board.  I was afraid I would make too many holes in the wall.

Lovely FREE desk (thank you, Momma!)  before the chaotic mess appeared. 

Life-saver cabinets.  I'm still in the "recording sessions" stage, hence the tripod.

All of the materials crammed into one shelf. 

Every SLP's staple: articulation cards

Game box: what every child always asks for!

Books, books, books.  And that's only half of the collection.

Two weeks ago on Monday evening, I had a sudden onset of holy crap, I'm going to die, fever.  Twelve hours and two or three antibiotics later, I had officially missed the single busiest work day.  Being the worry-wart that I am, I was freaking out to no end about not being paid and wondering how in the heck I am going to pay for a cracked windshield (I think about a week ago, a rock hit my windshield and the hotter-than-hades heat caused it to crack even more, but who knows).

Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God. Not only that, but we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
--Romans 5:2-5

    
Through trials and tribulations, don't lose faith.  Endure through every circumstance.  God will never leave your side.

 

Thank you

There are those moments in life I will never forget.  Maybe it was the time when I was in the My Little Pony playing stage and I decided to cut off all of a pony's mane so I could have a "daddy" pony because it was blue.  Go figure.  Or maybe it was when I met my very best friends in a middle school lunch room.  The first night in a dorm room with a complete stranger they forced on me as a roommate.  Or the morning the power went out in Drummond right before class.  That very moment when I opened up an acceptance letter to NSU and thought, "holy crap, I'm moving to Tahlequah for two years".  My very first class with Dr. P - Research Methods and Issues - and I wondered what the world I got myself into.  That moment when I just finished putting everything in its place in a 550 square foot studio apartment when no cable, relying on Gilmore Girls, DVD's, and Netflix as a form of entertainment.  My very first clinical experience at a school and how freaked out I was because I had never gone to a school site before.  The moment I fell in love with the little girl at the Children's Center who had Cerebral Palsy and melted my heart when she smiled.  The moment when I realized that JDMC was not for me, even though I already put in an application.  God was looking out for me on that one.  My very first adult patient in a veil bed flashing his unmentionables to me because he didn't want a blanket on top of him.  That moment when I didn't want to leave because I realized I wanted to work there for the rest of my life.  And now the present - awaiting a phone call to several places that are "in the works" and putting my faith in my Savior that He will take care of me like He always has.  These are the moments when I want to say thank you.

Thank you to everyone who has been involved in my life, whether past, present, or future, who have shaped who I have become.  I never thought my days of going to class during the summer, counting down the days until the next scheduled break, or even counting down the days until graduation would finally come to an end.  I could have not done any of this without the love and support of my loving family and wonderful friends.  Thank you, Grandpa, for letting me sit in on your speech therapy after you broke your neck - that one little session changed my life.  Thank you, Dr. former program director at OSU for telling me that I would never amount to anything in the SLP world and making me work even harder.  Thank you, Dr. G for teaching the hardest and best Neural class that challenged me in ways I never thought possible.  Thank you Dr. S for being such an amazing professor that wants to see everyone succeed and didn't treat us like graduate students, but rather human beings who would soon be colleagues.  Thank you Momma and Daddy for being patient as I moved thirteen times over the course of six years from dorm room to to dorm room, apartment to apartment ... and dealing with up to eight (or possibly more) car loads worth of stuff.

Thank you, and I love you all,

Kelsea

Matthew 5:8

"Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God."

Today is a slow, blustery, cloudy, soon to tornado kind of day. I would much rather be enjoying God's creation in the beautiful sun.. Oh, well, you have to sometimes have rain to make sunshine.

Last night, I decided to (finally!) stick to doing a devotion once a day - a goal I set for myself. I've justified new years day for this goal, but why not Mother's Day? I was reading about Ester and how God was still there in the midst of tragedy and when life couldn't become worse; it is by faith that we seek Him. God didn't just zap us with whatever characteristic or spiritual gift He wants, he gives us circumstances to exert and be challenged by them. I don't regret the mistakes I made in the past, because through those mistakes I was able to gain so much more. I was able to learn invaluable lessons and become closer to Jesus and grow stronger in Him. I was thinking about how my life would have been if I didn't have the circumstances or the people in my life that I have been blessed in the past and currently. I'm not so sure I would have the same spiritual mindset as I do have now, nor do I believe that I would still be hungry to read His word and learn from His word.

Last Saturday night, I went to church with my mom and Craig's wife Amy had the opportunity to preach on purity. It was simply life changing. Looking back on my life, I feel like I was completely covered in filth, and to this day, I am still working on keeping my body and spirit clean. Temptation is a very difficult issue for me, and I am constantly struggling, but I am thankful for this opportunity. And I honestly think that Satan is trying to get me back to where I was, because if I wasn't concerned about being pure in Christ, then why would Satan be constantly bugging me? But then again, I'm thankful that I am able to overcome his temptations. What's the point of calling yourself a Christian if your life does not reflect it? To me, that's being a hypocrite christian, which is something I never want to be associated with.

I want people to look at me and say that there's something different about me, something that they want, and that's the love of Christ exalted. I want to leave a legacy. How will they remember me? Did I choose to love? Did I point to You enough to make a mark on things? I want to leave an offering - a child of mercy and grace who blessed Your name unapologetically; and leave that kind of legacy.

xoxo.
Kelsea Lauren

Matthew 5:14-16

"You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."

This is such a cool verse. It reminds me of that childhood sunday school song, "this little light of mine". As of right now, I am only one more therapy session away from being finished with this amazing semester's practicum. I have gained so much more than I thought I would ... and honestly it couldn't have been taught in text books. Such as: goldfish is literally gold, playdoh mixes very easily, and boys will run around the room in circles if you let them. Oh, and the most important lesson: not everything is black and white to children. They can tell when you're having a good or bad day, when you are irritated or excited, and when they simply need to shhh and let me read to them.
I cannot believe in less than two months, I will begin my first of six semesters in grad school! This is absolutely crazy to imagine. I will finally be able to only take classes that pertain to my major, and be able to make a difference in a child's or adult's life. And then, after all of that mess, I will be able to officially write what could be the entire alphabet after my name. I cannot believe how quickly this semester has passed. I made a promise to myself that I would take one picture a day so I could have a memory - fail. I made a promise to myself that I would read a book a month - fail. To be honest, I'm okay with it, because it proves to me once again that I cannot make it without Jesus by my side. I constantly fail, constantly stumble and are constantly tempted. My philosophy is that the it's not how the circumstances effect you, but how you choose to change those circumstances.
Otherwise, life is going splendid. I am so happy where God has placed me in my life, and I am pretty sure if Prince Charming came along, I would have to wait. As much as it almost bugs the crud out of me to say this, but why would I want to rush being in love with someone when I have my whole life to show my unconditional love to my future husband and future children? Here are some other tidbits I've learned about myself this semester:

1. I'm an awful liar.
2. When someone makes a silly face at me I can't help but giggle.
3. Sleeping with my teddy bear keeps the monsters away.
4. My new phone has a horrible alarm. Therefore, I have busted out the old-school radio and tuned it to K-Love.
5. I love to read and I wish I had more time to dive into God's word.
6. I blink a lot in pictures. Go me. ;)
7. I find myself at peace when I'm with my life-time friends.
8. I hate alcoholic drinks because I can now taste the alcohol - gross.
9. I have too many shades of pink for nail polish. I think I have a slight obsession.
10. Organization saved my arse with clinic.

I cannot wait until grad school. It's gonna be big. :)

Kelsea Lauren

Blessings. See: Job 1:21

There have been many times where I have been selfish enough to say a quick prayer to God, hoping that I can have this blessing, or that blessing. Or, there are times where I expect blessings, I expect to have a good grade in a class or on a test. Through it all, I forget the simple gesture to simply get on my knees, bow my head, close my eyes, and thank God for everything that he has blessed me with recently, in the past, and in the future. I cannot believe that in just one year, I will be beginning my journey in graduate school to become a Speech-Language Pathologist. It truly feels like I just started, and I am in my fourth year at good ole OSU. I feel like this semester has been one of the best and worst thus far. Worse, because I have had to experience certain situations and endure them, but the best because I have learned and I have allowed God to overflow me with mercy, grace, forgiveness and trust. Trust has been such a hard issue for me recently. God is so amazing in closing one door and opening another. Just today, I became a "foster child" in my phi lamb family due to everyone becoming inactive. Now, God has blessed me with a new family to open up to and learn everyone's story. I am so very blessed.

"poetry, my life, my song
what keeps me alive
so instead of being scared
I just take a breath and dive

right into the music
feeling each beat
making absolute sure
not one is still in their seat

so they can feel what
I am trying to sing
so they can have something more
than just a dictionary meaning

that's my dream
so what are you waiting for
tell them your story
something they've never heard before."
-"Microphone", me.