"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."
I'm not sure how to begin this entry, so I'll just start in the middle...
I feel like these past eight weeks have been quite the journey. I never realized how unprepared I really was for my adult internship site until I stepped inside the rehab hospital doors. I could blame the school or the program, but that would be a lie. One of my not-so-new new year's resolutions is to stop blaming things on a third party. Own up to your own mistakes and learn from them. Much easier said than done, right?
I've been worried a lot about what will happen once I graduate, where I'll be for a job, where I'll be living once I move out of my mom's house (a bittersweet thought altogether), and how I'm going to handle being a "big girl" in this crazy world. I keep wondering the purpose of all of the rejection that has been coming my way, telling and reassuring myself that there is a reason, I just don't know what God's plan is, or why He's doing this. I know there's a reason, but the almost-permanent rose-colored glasses are fogging up my view.
Imagine going on a simple search engine and seeing almost two-hundred places begging for an SLP. Sounds too good to be true, right? Yeah, that's what I wasn't thinking. The elephant in the room is that many places do not want to take clinical fellows because that automatically means they have to provide a supervisor to make sure you're doing what you're supposed to be doing and you're not messing something up. This also means paying for two salaries, not one. Well, of course, a company doesn't want to do that, so they choose the person who already has their licenses and can work without a supervisor. And it also doesn't help that everyone I know already has a job (hello, melodramatic self)... (End selfish rant.)
Have faith, Kelsea. I'll take care of you. I'm not going to forsake you. There is a job out there just for you and there is a reason why I have closed every single door and not yet opened one. Just keep praying, My child. Come to Me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
Thank You, Lord. You know exactly what I need.
Much Love,
Kelsea
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